The Writing Lair

Every writer needs a lair. It can be something as simple as a table in a furnace room, or an attic filled with desks and shelves. For me, it’s a dark basement with no windows. Regardless, wherever you spend your time penning prose, here are some essentials to populate your space.


MOGWAI SLIPPERS: Basements get cold, so foot coverage is mandatory. Any slipper style will do, but movie-based ones work the best.



TOMMY WISEAU BOBBLE-HEAD: Any fans of The Room out there? If so, this needs no explanation. If you haven’t seen the movie, run out and purchase it today. And then buy a second copy as backup. Seriously.



FARGO SNOW GLOBE: When I managed the video store (in my younger days) I scored all kinds of movie bling. Toys are an important distraction to help your mind wander when you’re sick of looking at your computer screen.



FUTON: Stuck for an idea? Need to give your eyes a rest? Napping is a critical part of the writing process.



MINI FRIDGE: Dehydration is a writer’s worst enemy. Keep your fridge stocked at all times with soda and cheap beer.






BOOKS: Keep your favorite authors within close reach for inspiration . . . or to remind you how lousy your writing is. Which, in theory, should motivate you to work harder. In theory.



DESK: Last but not least, you should probably have a desk (with a computer) to accomplish actual writing. This is probably the least popular part of the writing lair. Funny how that works…


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